You're Cordially Invited, Here's What You Need to Know

Attending a wedding isn’t just about showing up and enjoying free cake. It’s about supporting the couple and becoming part of a carefully orchestrated experience — one they’ve likely spent months (and thousands of dollars) planning.

As wedding photographers, we’ve seen it all — from the effortlessly elegant guests to the ones who unintentionally derail the timeline. This guide is here to help you be the guest every couple hopes will show up.

1. Follow the Dress Code

Why It Matters

That “semi-formal” note on the invite? It’s not a suggestion. It helps set the tone — and ensures the group photos aren’t a visual mess.

• Formal: Tuxedos and gowns
• Semi-Formal: Suits and cocktail dresses
• Casual: Sundresses, collared shirts, stylish separates

Showing up in jeans to a vineyard wedding? Don’t be that guest.

Related: The Ultimate Canadian Wedding Etiquette Guide (For Couples)

2. Show Up On Time — But Not Too Early

Timing is Everything

Arrive 20–30 minutes before the ceremony starts. Too early and you risk spoiling the first-look moment. Too late and you’re the guest everyone turns to glare at during the vows.

Related: The Ultimate Wedding Day Timeline (According to Your Photographer)

3. Respect the Signs and Boundaries

Don’t Wander or Jump Ahead

If there’s a “Do Not Enter” sign on the reception room, don’t peek. If the dessert table is set up early, admire it — don’t touch it. Trust the couple’s flow and timeline.

Related: Things That Always Go Wrong on Wedding Days (According to Photographers)

4. Don’t Play Photographer

This Isn’t Your Moment to Capture

The couple hired a professional (or two). Stay seated during key moments like the processional and first kiss. Don’t block the aisle with your phone.

5. Don’t Raid the Dessert Table

It’s Probably Not Open Yet

Yes, it’s tempting. But dessert tables often double as decor until the reception is in full swing. Wait for the cue — and let the photographer grab a shot before you grab a cupcake.

Related: How to Plan a Wedding in Canada — Month-by-Month Timeline

6. Be Quiet During Speeches

Don’t Talk Over Someone’s Toast

Someone’s sharing their heart. You talking over it about your flight delay? Rude. It’s a few minutes. Pay attention and clap like you mean it.

7. Giving a Speech? Don’t Wing It.

How Not to Bomb

• Stick to 3–5 minutes
• Don’t mention exes
• Run it by someone first
• Leave the stand-up routine at home
• Know your audience (grandma’s watching)

8. Don’t Give Surprise Toasts

If It’s Not on the Itinerary, Don’t Grab the Mic

We’ve never seen a tipsy uncle’s impromptu speech go well. Leave the mic to the people the couple asked to speak.

9. Drink, But Don’t Overdo It

It’s a Celebration, Not a Challenge

An open bar isn’t a dare. Know your limits. The last thing a couple wants is to babysit guests — or pay for broken decor. See: Guest Experience: Why It Matters

Related: Guest Experience: Why It Matters (Even for Your Photos)

10. Give a Thoughtful Gift

The Unwritten Rule

In Canada, your gift should roughly match the value of your place at the table — often around $100 per person. It’s not about the money. It’s about showing appreciation for being included.

Final Thought: You’re Part of the Experience

Being a great guest doesn’t require perfection — just presence, respect, and a little self-awareness. Follow the couple’s lead, respect the moment, and celebrate with intention.